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You Are Old, Father William

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"You Are Old, Father William" is a song. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum sing part of it in the 1951 Disney film, Alice in Wonderland. They Might Be Giants sing the full song in the soundtrack of the 2010 film Alice in Wonderland.
You Are Old Father William - They Might Be Giants02:33

You Are Old Father William - They Might Be Giants


"You are old, Father William," the young man said

"And your hair has become very white

And yet you incessantly stand on your head

Do you think, at your age, it is right?"

"In my youth," Father William replied to his son

"I feared it might injure the brain

But now that I'm perfectly sure I have none

Why, I do it again and again"

"I am old,

I am old

I will tell you again, I am old"

"You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before

And have grown most uncommonly fat

Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door

Pray, what is the reason of that?"

"In my youth," said the sage, as he shook his gray locks

"I kept all my limbs very supple

By the use of this ointment, one shilling a box

Allow me to sell you a couple?"

"I am old,

I am old

It's a statement, in fact, I am old"

"You are old," said the youth, "and your jaws are too weak

For anything tougher than suet

Yet you finish the goose, with the bones and the beak

Pray, how did you manage to do it?"

"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law

And argued each case with my wife

And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw

Has lasted the rest of my life"

"I am old,

I am old

There's not much more to say, I am old"

"You are old," said the youth, "one would hardly suppose

That your eye was as steady as ever

Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose

What made you so awfully clever?"

"I have answered three questions, and that is enough"

Said his father, "don't give yourself airs!

Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?

Be off or I'll kick you downstairs!"



Be off or I'll kick you downstairs!"