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Muppets Most Wanted Teaser 10

"Interrogation Song" is a song from the 2014 film Muppets Most Wanted performed by Sam the Eagle and Jean Pierre Napoleon (Ty Burrell) with The Muppets.

According to Bret McKenzie, "it's a conversation put to music, and actually started out as dialogue from the film."

Gonzo's testimony, as well as several other little pieces of the song, are absent in the theatrical release, but reinstated in the extended version.

Lyrics

Italics indicate lyrics only on the album version and the extended version of the movie.

Sam: Kermit, let's begin
Describe the day you played Berlin
Constantine (pretending to be Kermit): We rehearsed and then we walked about
We ate bratwurst and sauerkraut
Jean Pierre: That night, at 10:03
Were you inside the portrait gallery?
Constantine: From 10:00 to 10:04
Was when we did the show's encore
Sam: Hm, frog, we've got our doubts
Can you confirm your whereabouts?
Constantine: My alibi is watertight
The audience saw me sing all night
Jean Pierre: Monsieur, we know you did the crime
Constantine: I was onstage that whole time
Ask who sang Rainbow Connection.
Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Kermit! No more questions!
Jean Pierre (spoken): Hello! I think it's time for good cop/romantic cop.
Miss Piggy, you cleaned up lock inside
Now's your chance to save your hide
Miss Piggy: Oh, gentlemen, I did not know
It's a crime to steal the show
Sam: Tell us how the art was taken
Jean Pierre: If you want to save your bacon
Miss Piggy: I haven't seen your missing art
All I stole was audience hearts
Sam: We can give you a plea deal
Jean Pierre: All you have to do is squeal
Miss Piggy: I'm not a thief, I don't know how
All I've ever taken is a bow
Jean Pierre: We'll catch the swine that did this job
Miss Piggy: Give up the pig puns, creep!
Go jump in a lake, that's my suggestion!
Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Piggy! No more questions!
Jean Pierre (spoken): I think she likes me, no?
Sam (spoken): I don't think your puns are helping the investigation.
Jean Pierre: You know, I think they did it
Sam: No, they didn't!
Jean Pierre: Yes, they did, and we can pin it
Sam: If they did, how did they do it?
Jean Pierre: If they didn't, how did they didn't?
Sam: If they didn't, then it's easy
'Cause they simply didn't do it
Jean Pierre: If they did it, then I knew it
But we've nothing that can prove it!
(spoken): Ahem. Oh excuse me. Bring in the purple guy with the schnoz.
Sam: Do you remember what you did
On the night you played Madrid?
Gonzo: I was hit by a raging bull
And rushed off-stage to the hospital
Jean Pierre: Gonzo, what do you know
About the sculpture theft at Madrid's Prado?
Gonzo: I never saw the stolen bust
I spent the night in bed concussed
Sam: The truth, Gonzo, the clock is ticking
Gonzo: If you don't believe me, ask the chicken
Camilla was there, she'll cooperate
Jean Pierre: Madam, are you willing to corroborate?
Camilla: (clucking)
Sam: Will somebody get this chicken out of here?
Gonzo: Calm down, Camilla, it's a routine inspection
Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Gonzo! No more questions!
Jean Pierre: Let's go from the start
What do you know about the stolen art?
Lew Zealand: I didn't know there was a plan
Dr. Teeth: Your accusation's far out, man!
Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: The chances of us committing a crime
Are less than .009
The Swedish Chef: (Faux-Swedish)
Jean Pierre: To help with our investigation
Can you do a full translation?
Translator/Beaker: What the chef just said to you was "Shnoopdy-shnoopdy-shnoo." It's not Swedish.
Animal: (grunts and laughs)
Penguins: (quacking)
Fozzie Bear: Uh, I can do an Elvis impression
Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Muppets! No more questions!
Jean Pierre: They didn't
Sam: No, they didn't
Jean Pierre: There's no way they did the crime
Sam: They couldn't, they're too stupid
Jean Pierre: They're not criminal masterminds
Sam: We do not know who did it
But we know they didn't do it
Jean Pierre and Sam: So we know who didn't do it
Yes, we know who didn't do it!
Jean Pierre (spoken): They're incapable of being culpable.


v - e - d
The Muppets Logo
Media
Television shows: The Muppet ShowMuppet BabiesLittle Muppet MonstersMuppeTelevisionMuppets TonightThe Muppets

Television specials: Hey Cinderella!The Frog PrinceThe Muppet Musicians of BremenThe Muppets Go to the MoviesThe Fantastic Miss Piggy ShowThe Muppets: A Celebration of 30 YearsThe Tale of the Bunny PicnicA Muppet Family ChristmasThe Muppets at Walt Disney WorldThe Muppets Celebrate Jim HensonMr. Willowby's Christmas TreeStudio DC: Almost LiveA Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa
Movies: The Muppet MovieThe Great Muppet CaperThe Muppet Christmas CarolMuppet Treasure IslandThe Muppets' Wizard of OzThe MuppetsMuppets Most Wanted
Video games: My Muppets ShowAnimal DrummerTap Tap Muppets

Disney Parks
Muppets CourtyardMuppet*Vision 3D

Entertainment: Here Come the MuppetsHollywood's Pretty WomanMuppet Mobile LabMuppets on Location: Days of Swine and RosesThe Muppets Present… Great Moments in American History
Restaurants: Mama Melrose's Ristorante ItalianoPizzeRizzoThe Great Gonzo's Pandemonium Pizza Parlor (Unbuilt)
Shops: It's A Wonderful ShopStage 1 Company StoreThe Writer's Stop
Parade: Disney Stars and Motorcars Parade

Characters
Muppets: Kermit the FrogMiss PiggyFozzie BearGonzoAnimalRizzo the RatPepe the King PrawnStatler and WaldorfBunsen HoneydewBeakerScooterBean BunnyDr. TeethFloyd PepperJaniceZootRowlf the DogRobin the FrogThe Swedish ChefSam the EagleSweetumsBobo the BearUncle DeadlyCamillaWalterClifford80s RobotThogSeymourLew ZealandBeauregardThe MoopetsConstantineDenise

Humans: MaxDoc HopperSnake WalkerProfessor KrassmanBernie the AgentLew LordGaryMaryDominic BadguyNadyaJean Pierre Napoleon

Vehicles
The Electric Mayhem BusLe Maximum
Songs
The Muppet Movie: The Rainbow ConnectionMoving Right AlongNever Before, Never AgainI Hope That Somethin' Better Comes AlongCan You Picture That?I'm Going to Go Back There SomedayAmerica

The Great Muppet Caper: Hey a Movie!Happiness HotelSteppin' Out With a StarNight LifeThe First Time It HappensCouldn't We Ride
The Muppet Christmas Carol: ScroogeGood King WenceslasMarley and MarleyChairman of the BoardFozziwig's PartyWhen Love is GoneIt Feels Like ChristmasChristmas ScatBless Us AllThankful HeartWhen Love Is Found
Muppet Treasure Island: Treasure IslandShiver My TimbersSomething BetterSailing for AdventureCabin FeverBoom ShakalakaLove Led Us HereLove PowerLove Led Us Here
The Muppets' Wizard of Oz: KansasWhen I'm With YouNap TimeThe Witch Is in the HouseCalling All MunchkinsGood Life
A Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa: Delivering ChristmasIt's All About HeartI Wish I Could Be Santa ClausMy Best Christmas Yet
The Muppets: Life's a Happy SongPictures in My HeadMe and Julio Down by the SchoolyardWe Built This CityMe PartyLet's Talk About MeMan or MuppetSmells Like Teen SpiritForget YouThe Whistling Caruso
Muppets Most Wanted: We're Doing a SequelI'm Number OneThe Big HouseI'll Get You What You Want (Cockatoo in Malibu)Interrogation SongMy Heart Will Go OnSomething So RightWorking in the Coal MineTogether AgainMoves Like JaggerMacarena