- “This isn't a hotel! This is a circus! The dogs, and cats, and rats, and clowns, and twins.”
"Hotel Inspector" is the 4th episode of the first season of The Suite Life of Zack & Cody. When a hotel inspector inspects the Tipton Hotel, Zack accidentally loses his and Cody's lab rats Bonnie and Clyde, which makes Mr. Moseby lose his job. Zack then enlists the help of Cody, Esteban, and Muriel to get Mr. Moseby back.
The episode starts when Zack's rats leave his Suite, and was free in the Tipton, and when Ilsa (the Hotel Inspector) sees them, fires Mr. Moseby, and she starts to be the Hotel Manager. Zack realizes that he has done something bad, so he enlists the help of Cody and Maddie to get Moseby back. Zack tells Moseby that Ilsa is cruel and strict (which she is) and begs him to come back, but there is nothing that Moseby can do.
Meanwhile, London is celebrating Ivana's birthday with a bunch of dogs. Inspired by a famous paintng, London decides that it will be a poker party. Ilsa does not want to let dogs play poker in the hotel, but she has no choice but to let it happen because London's father owns the hotel.
Zack learns about the party and takes advantage of it by letting the dogs free (they were not very good at poker anyway). He also lets the rats free. Then, he rushes to Moseby's apartment and says that Ilsa is allowing dogs and rats to run everywhere. Now furious, Moseby goes back to the hotel and tells Ilsa that she is doing a horrible job as the hotel manager, getting her fired in the process. Moseby is the hotel manager again, though Ilsa vows revenge...
During the credits, Maddie is dressed up as a dog and wins a game of poker against real dogs.
- Mr. Moseby: Esteban, I want gift baskets for all these guests immediately.
- Esteban: For you, anything! (to Ilsa) For you, bubkes!
- Carey: Hey, Muriel, when you were cleaning in there, did you see a five-dollar bill?
- Muriel: I thought you were throwing that away.
- Carey: It was on my dresser.
- Muriel: My bad.
- Esteban: Don't worry, Mr. Moseby. I am gluing the vase down as you said. Soon it will be twin proof.
- Ilsa: For the love of schnitzel!
- Esteban: Oh, Mr. Moseby! You received a fax. The Tipton Hotel Inspector is on her way for surprise inspection.
- Mr. Moseby: How can it be a surprise inspection if they sent a fax?
- Esteban: Because the fax came two weeks ago and I forgot to give it to you. Surprise!
- Ilsa: Get this dog off of me!
- London: (apathetically) No. Bad dog. Stop.
- Carey: Mr. Moseby's just doing his job. He needs to keep this hotel running smoothly and you tend to be... un-smooth.
- Cody: Yeah, un-smooth like when Mom doesn't shave her legs for two weeks.
- Ilsa: This isn't a hotel! This is a circus! The dogs, and cats, and rats, and clowns, and twins. The only thing missing is a bearded lady. (Mr. Moseby opens his mouth) Watch it!